Farm Girl at Heart

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“Farm Girl is a Condition of the Heart…” – mjb

In just a few weeks time I will be finding myself at Farm Girl Farm in Great Barrington, MA. The decision was decided all along, as I didn’t over think it or not think of it at all… it just happened naturally. Originally when I came out here my plan was to head back after the winter to the mainland and farm for the following season… oh, how easy that could change when you are in Hawaii and are able to farm here 12 months of the year.. i.e. heaven. But it was still in the back of my mind when I applied to a few farms and actually heard back from Farm Girl Farm and with great interest! FGF definitely stayed on my mind the next few months and I just let it sit there comfortably as I went about my days – taking in the sun, the farming, the friends and everything else this place has to offer.

As the end of March rolled around I decided that a decision needed to be made. I wrote Laura and told her that I was happy in Hawaii but knew I could be happy there as well – that if she had any thoughts about it to let me know. I should have known but the following evening I got a very thoughtful letter from Laura admitting that farming in Hawaii would be a hard situation to leave but made some really valid points on why FGF would be an excellent fit.. how a small farm in NE gets going every season, how I might be able to do it myself someday without acquiring a ton of loans, the sense of “yes, you can!” and ultimately adding diversity to my skill set and my experiences. A few other perks included the CRAFT program visits and workshops where you can see how a bunch of other farms in the region get their work done in different specialty practices like bio-dynamic growing, using horse power, etc. Not to mention the place – Great Barrington, MA – where the community is strong, the energy is high and the opportunities to be outside are plentiful.

Besides all of these great reasons I think I knew in my heart that I needed to go. That the easy decision would be to stay in Hawaii – where my heart and mind was being fulfilled each day by my Hawaiian Ohana and the spiritual and physical nourishment I was getting from both the land and the sea… I felt like this place was no longer a just a place but a home… one in which I could always come back to… which made me realize that the harder decision would be to go – to leave, yes, that’s what would pull at my heart strings and make me stronger. The decision became clear and my body became full of energy – so much I wasn’t sure what to do with it. I decided to tell Barry – and after a long heartfelt conversation with him I knew he understood… and I knew he knew just how much I cared about this place. Which might be why he was so sad to find that I was going to leave in just a months time.

But I suppose that’s the nature of this place and the program – people come and go – and the days keep rolling on by. But either way they leave a piece of themselves and gain the many pieces of the hearts that made the experience worthwhile. Upon coming here I had no expectations – other than an adventure in farming, seeing a new place and finding out more about myself… but I found so much more here – namely the relationships that I could never imagine my life without … before them I’m not sure what I did without them – which makes them all the more powerful – making me all the more powerful because I have their love and they have mine.

So when I drift back to the mainland in just shy of a weeks time I will take a piece of this place and all of them with me. Their support will warm me on those sunny, summer afternoons and I will smile knowing that my life is brighter with all of them in it. I’m excited for this new change – I think it will bring me one step closer to where I want to be.. which makes me happy and proud. Time to keep growing – time to love – time to be in a new place – time to meet new people – time to feed a community and above all time to just be in the moment and see what happens… ❤

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One Response to Farm Girl at Heart

  1. Anonymous says:

    I love your photos!! I actually love Siobhan, I track everything about her :). On that quest, I am so glad to round aground on stuff as yours. What a trip you did, it’s awesomely beautiful! Oh and your pics of Rory & Siobhan for halloween are awesome too! Hope your new departure work out well. Your post put a smile on my face, nice decision. Best, Lauren

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